am I a bad panda?

I know I say this a LOT... but I still can't quite believe people are STILL reading my witherings on here. I had over 200 hits today. That's nuts!

You guys are ALL very very lovely.

Sending each and everyone of you a virtual HUG.

If by reading this just one person feels a little bit less alone, a little less numb, then I'll ALWAYS keep on writing. And if by reading this people are getting more used to talking about mental health then its all worthwhile stuff.

Thank YOU.

Right now though, I'm getting my knickers in a right old twist. I've got to finish my Christmas shopping tomorrow, ARGGGGGGGGGGGH.

Stress city.

I have my list. I have the names of the 3 shops I need to visit. I just need to get up and GO.

But a certain person has just asked me to go to the post office whilst I'm in town and now my plan is all squewif. Cuz I can't say no because that would make me a bad panda. So I hinted that I'm a bit anxious about it all and I'm on kind of a strict mission with no distractions. It didn't go down well...

 Curses. What to do. I don't want to be selfish. But I can only cope with so much. I just find it so difficult when I make a plan and then I have to change or adjust it. Susie's anxious brain does not like change. Yuk.

Think I'll go and have a fag and mull it all over....and hopefully untwist my knickers....

xxx