if you say that, I'll do this

Today is officially the most depressing day of the year...According to statistics anyway...The day when most people give up on their new years resolution's and realise they spent far too much money at Christmas. That's what 'they' say anyway...

I have a lot of annoying/weird habits...and one of them is being slightly rebellious...(actually I don't mind being like this, but I think it pisses other people off...) If someone tells me to do something, I pretty much want to do the opposite. (I'd be a really terrible soldier...running off on crazy little adventures refusing to polish my very muddy boots...)

I don't like being put in a box or being requested to behave in a certain way. No, no, no. Its like trying to wear a jumper that's 2 sizes to big, looks awful, feels uncomfortable, and makes you want to stand in a corner not talking to anyone.

Well, that's just me anyway.

Grr I'm getting really frustrated now because I'm getting all my words muddled up and I have lost my train of thought.

I think what I'm trying to say is I want to prove to these statistic people wrong....I want to show them that today hasn't been too awful...and I hope other people have been able to see some light in the darkness today too....

My Monday has been full of my art class, which I just love. We were working in colour too which gets me so excited! (I nearly fell off my stool a couple of times...) And yes I am knackered now and I will probably spend the rest of the night spaced out in front of the TV, but that's OK, my brain needs a rest.

On a similar note someone very very lovely recommended this song to me, and I cant stop listening to it...

These lyrics just keep on hitting me in the face, kapow! They remind me of all the nasty demons and darkness that I'm slowly and surely untangling myself from...and that one day, if I keep fighting, I will be free.


"Free" by Pete Murray

As far as you know, you will make the distance
Even if everything is falling down,
But don't lose that vision
And don't lose your courage
Until you are standing right here with me now

I want you, to stand up and fight every moment with me
For the truth, it's your love
Your destiny that I see
In my shoes, so tell me when do you wanna be free?
Only you can tell me

When do you wanna be free?
When do you wanna be free?
When do you wanna be free?
When do you wanna be free?

xxx

(apologies for my awful writing tonight, I've been sat here for an hour, pressing delete and retyping stuff...I'm not sure if it makes any sense even to me....!Ah typical..!)